Part 88: Gumbo NPC Chatter 1

Welcome back! Gumbo is full of characters, most of whom are interesting. Let's get started!



Straight away, the innkeeper lets us know that things aren't quite right in this village. And doesn't let us have a dinner conversation, the jerk.

There is, in fact, a dinner conversation defined for this point in the game. It's inaccessible without the debug menu, though. I'll be showing it off, along with some other unused content, after disc 1 ends.

Whatever, we're out of MP anyway, so let's stay the night.

: Good, we have a first class room prepared for you. Relax and enjoy!

The item shop also has... a thing.



Dunno, I'm always somewhat fond of the "shopkeeper is asleep" joke.



: Messenger...? The Frog God?

: I am Master Frog, employed by the Frog God. Now that you have come to Gumbo, please extol the frogs.

: Huh? Extol the frogs? Is that some kind of superstition?

: Oh! To see a messenger of the Frog God at this time! Oh, thank you, thank you!

That... ended on a weird note.



Dammit, now I wish Gadwin had kept his Hero's Armband.

: What? No. Well, they do match, but....

: Yes. I am the frog sorceress who channels the Frog God. My specialty is telling love fortunes.



As usual, we'll be indulging the NPC.

: I'll have my fortune told!

: Mmmmmph! I... see... it... mmmmmmmnnnnn!



Why yes, this is going to be a recurring joke throughout this village.

: what's happening?!

: Oh, excuse me. The Frog God has come. Don't worry. Ho ho ho. Well, how splendid! Suffering is where this love is headed. You are awaiting a great suffering. Up and down, but at least it won't be a boring love. Ribbit! Oh my, excuse me. Ho ho ho.

They're the two leads in a very anime JRPG. I could've told you that, lady.

: I don't care for fortune telling.

: Recently, love fortune customers have dropped off, so I have too much free time. It can't be helped, but this is more free time than I care for. I was divining tomorrow's weather. It will be clear again. Everyday the futility mounts. What I want to do is tell love fortunes.



: Big sis...? NO!

: Oh, my, my. Then are you on a hot spring trip with your mother?

: What!? No way!

: Oh, my, my. Say, are you the couple? Truly, truly THE couple?

... I'm getting a bad feeling about this.



: Cliff! Get it, Seagull, cliff! Aha, ha ha!

: Oh, brother....

: Hmm... I guess bad jokes are a part of everyone's culture.

: Hey, I've got one. What do you call a man who is sick? Chuck! Get it?



Just in case you thought I was making up that party chatter in order to punch up the update.

^{_{That was terrible. I apologize.}}

: Aha ha ha ha! That's a good one! I've gotta use that some time! I'll have to work on my jokes more, so I can tell you a new one next time I see you!

This NPC, by the way? Finding out about him is what made me want to do the whole NPC Chatter thing in the first place.



: Oh, no! I can't let anyone see me like this! Go away. Just don't talk to me!

: What? Wait a minute.

: St-stay away from me! Leave me be, please. Oh, Frog God, please. Don't let any men get close to me.

: That's a pretty horrible thing to wish for.

: Hmm, the men and women in Gumbo don't get along at all.

Hmm. Let's talk to the kid, maybe he's going to freak out less.

: Eeew, you're just covered in mud. You ought to take a good bath when you get home.

: Yes, OK. Yeow. Stop! I shouldn't have talked with a girl! Don't talk to her! It will make Papa angry!



Thankfully, the elders are too old to be worrying about sex, and actually give us new info.

: Did you say there's a hot spring here? Great, I love a hot bath.

: Yes, but this hot spring isn't flowing. Because of that, I haven't taken a bath in two months.



: Now, the hot spring has stopped, and there's only cold water. The pool has ceased to be.

: It's expired, and gone to meet it's maker! It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If it weren't a liquid, it'd be pushing up the daisies! It's hydrological processes are history! It's off the twig! It's kicked the bucket, shuffled off this mortal coil, run down the curtain, and joined the bleedin' choir invisible! This is an ex-spring!

: ...

: Well, SOMEONE had to say it.

: Oh how I wish that the hot spring would return right away. It felt so good to swim in there.

.... Wait a second. Take another look at that screenshot up there.



How could that same sun be back in Parm and over here in Gumbo? It's a conspiracy, I tell you!



: Waah. A woman!? Leave me alone, I'm working. Don't talk to me!

: What!? I-I'm sorry.

: I'm working. It's hard work planting the fields. I'm very, very busy.

: Hello there, Gadwin! It's been a long time. How are you?

: Oh, same as always. It looks like you've been doing well.

: We're still beholden to you. Well, why don't you stay a while? Gadwin is a whiz at digging hot springs. He just thrusts his sword once into the ground, just like that. Then a hot spring gushes forth. It would take the people of Gumbo a whole day to dig a hot spring. But that was a long time ago. If the hong springs no longer flow, then there is nothing. Gadwin, you must have come just for the hot springs, but they're not flowing now.



: What!? How could that be?

: I was mean to the frogs in the pond, so it must be the curse of the Frog God!

: Mean to them? What did you do?

: Well... I just couldn't hold it in. I... I peed in the water....

: Whoa! That's gross!

: The ancestors of the frogs probably got angry and stopped the hot spring.



: Yes, so it seems.

: Look, there's one over there, too. I wonder if the frog is their god.

: There are so many. Gumbo villagers really like frogs, don't they?

: If frogs are gods, I wonder if the word "ribbit" is a prayer?



: Oh, well! We won't have anything to eat, but we won't die as long as there's the festival.

The New Parm of the East.

: What are you saying? You'll die if you don't eat!

: Wait a minute! We can't have the festival! That's the problem!

: Can't have the festival? What are you talking about?

: Oh, am I worried. Only this much of this year's rice remains. We'll have to wait until the MOgay tribal merchants come on their peddling tour.

: Mogay tribal merchants? Does that have anything to do with Guido whom we met in Dight?

: The Mogay tribe lives on the other side of the sea. It's just hearsay, but they've probably already returned home because the Mermaids have come.

: The Mermaids?



: There are no customers in here.

: Perhaps you're not so popular?

: No, the "Gourmet Frog Restaurant" is a favorite dating spot for couples. We used to have them waiting in line. Well, since no one's here today, you can have the whole place to yourselves. Sit down, relax.



Might wanna get that looked at, guy.

: Oh, why do you do this to me? You are a woman, a woman...! ... ...!?

: ... Huh? ... What?

: Wo-wo-woman! Stop, stop! Don't come closer! Woman, woman....!

: What's with this guy!?

: Give it up. I don't see, hear, or talk to women. Boo hoo!



So many good lines in Gumbo.



: Ah, but you turn away from me... Someday together with you.... You...!?

: What? Me?

: Eeek! No, a man! Stay away! No, no! Shut up! A man... men are no good!



: There is a story that long ago a man and woman did something evil. For that reason, Gumbo became a lonely village with no happy couples. Even the Spirits hated that Gumbo, and they would not come near. Then the Brave Couple appeared.

: One day, not fearing the past, the two became a couple. The people of Gumbo offered the village for them, and celebrated a festival. It was a joyous festival with song and dance that enticed the Spirits. The festival would go on forever.

: After that, the couple invited the blessings of the Spirits and the festival would be uninterrupted. There, did you know about that? This Gumbo was warm all year, and men and women were happy.

: What? Now it's totally different. It's not warm and the men and women are not getting along.

: Originally, Gumbo was just like paradise. There's a reason it became like this.



: ...!? Did you... did you see us?

: What?

: But, we're brother and sister! We are not a couple. No, no, no! Say now! Keep it secret that I was alone with my brother, Toto. Please promise. PROMISE!

Today's update of Let's Play Grandia is apparently co-written by George R. R. Martin.

: ...!? Hah! Did you see us?

: Huh? What do you mean?

: Com' on, stop kidding around. You saw us, didn't you? But don't misunderstand. At most, we are like a close brother and sister. We are certainly not a couple! Lulu and I are meeting like this, but at most, we are like a close brother and sister. Just because we were together doesn't mean that we're a couple! Don't misunderstand!

That.... I think I need to stop playing for a bit. Hopefully things are less freaky next time.